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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Fragile Flower

What is most inspiring about teaching at JDC, is that every day that we come together---new kids come to class. This is inspiring and yet a little heartbreaking--knowing that these kids are in JDC--inspiring knowing that everyday that Yoga is in their life---they begin to enjoy a freshness and mystery that reveals itself in the richness of each moment that they are practicing.

We had 13 girls today---8 of which were brand new to JDC and Yoga--the one thing I noticed about one of the girls was the deep wide cuts on her arms in a railroad pattern, the cuts that come from absence of feeling, the cuts that show on the outside some deep wide cuts on her inside. I thought of this fragile flower many times today--I wondered what could have deadened her feeling so much that she resorted to being a cutter--being a cutter results from not allowing yourself to feel anything that gives pleasure or pain, this comes from having your soul broken and the desperation that leaves an imprint of emptiness, and the cutting makes you feel something even if it is dull aching pain. This fragile flower worked hard in class--she really tried to hold her down dog--her warrior and when savasana came I noticed a tear, just one fall down her cheek. We ended with the story of the bumble bee--how overcoming adversity starts with believing you can achieve anything no matter what anyone says or if you are the only one who believes it. After our Namaste--the girls roll their mats, and generally jump up and start their chatter about their court hearings, their jailhouse boyfriends---this fragile flower came up to me after class and whispered "thank you." There was a crack of light shining in that thank you and that is why Yoga is beneficial to all souls---the crack of light! Om Namah Shivaya--I bow to the true teacher who lives inside me as me---May the crack of light shine on the fragile flower and give her the warmth she is desperatly seeking................................

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